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I’ll do it, but only if you’ll help

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Yes, I agree with you to a point, Jeff. Sometimes fish die. And the idea of you bringing in a wizened old fish with a long, grey beard and a zimmer frame is kinda cutsey. (Or have I been watching too much "Finding Nemo"?) Indeed, I'd be very impressed if you found one like that, that died of old age.

Er, but wild salmon are an endangered species! Now call me old fashioned, but I'm not sure that the idea of killing something on a whim - especially something which is facing extinction - is particularly farcical?! There must be a reason why there are whole charities set up to trying to save them:-

By your logic, could we not hire a hitman to bludgeon you to death in a comical way? A large salmon with a club, perhaps?!

If any of the above strikes you as being an "over-sentimental" attitude to hold towards a salmon, then perhaps I could just trouble you for one further reply? I won't take up too much of your time; I know that you have an important plan to finalise.

Perhaps you would be so kind as to explain what you think that the difference is between your good self and a salmon, that entitles one to be used over the other in the name of comedy?

Yours expectantly,

Milly xxx
Milly, 14 years ago.

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